Hi, my name is Gabe. I've been a closet Universalist for a few years now.
I've tried many times to come out of the closet, but every time I am met with strange stares, wide open mouths, turned heads, snide disbelief, concern for the state of my 'immortal' soul, hostility, and at least one guy who said he does not agree but still hopes that I'm right. I've even been dumped right out of a budding relationship because of my belief that Yahshua is the savior of the whole world.
So, these days, I pretty much keep it to myself. Its a little secret that nothing can ever convince me is not true, but I have to hide it in my heart.
It stings to feel like an outcast and a heretic. It is a lonely place to go to a christian fellowship and feel almost like I have nothing in common with those people. Thankfully I know a few who really do have hearts for the Lord, they just happen to still have their eyes blinded by that disgusting tradition. Every time they say that they feel bad that people are going to hell, I cringe and bite my tongue.
My disenfranchisement with 'churchianity' recently almost caused my feet to slip away from Christ altogether. I found myself believing less and less, going to bars, acting dumb, but the Lord knocked some sense back into me. So I am back seeking his face again, enduring the loneliness and isolation.
Anyway, I haven't read too much on this forum yet, so I don't know anybody. I just signed up. I remember this site had a forum a long time ago but there was so much fighting Gary took it down. I just now realized there was a new one. I know most of you here are probably in the same boat that I'm in, unless you're all here to fight against UR.. in which case I guess I'm screwed.. but I doubt that.
I'm from Hammond, Louisiana. If there is anyone here from near there I'd love to know about it! I'm a 27 year old guy still in college. I have a degree in computers, which I now hate. I am going back a second time to study classical guitar, which I'm in my very last semester of and trying desperately not to quit right at the end.
I guess I am waiting on the Lord to find out what the next chapter of my life will be. I feel like I've been in a cage for so long. I don't know what's really out there, but I know so much is going on in the natural & the spiritual. I just want to get out there and get my hands dirty doing something other than living for myself.
But anyway.. I'd like to make some friends on here.. so if anyone is friendly.. hit me up ;p
Hello Gabe
(http://www.tentmaker.org/forum/Themes/default/images/welcome_mat.jpg) to Tentmaker.
Well there are still some strong opinions here but we have been up almost a year. In all families there are disagreements and that is allowed here so long as folk remain civil.
Blessings
Welcome Gabe. You are not an outcast here. In fact, you fit right in.
John
:cloud9: Welcome Gabe........ :gangel: :bgdance: :girlheart: :icon_flower: :icon_joker: :friendstu: :angel4: :banana: :trampoline: :welcome: :newb: :Urock: :Violinhit: :beach: We're all different, but we're all friendly.......... :thumbsup:
Gabe, Jesus was also an outcast and called a heretic by his fellow "brethren". I'd say you're in good company here.
Welcome :myahoo: :welcome:
Welcome Gabe. It's hard, isn't it? I feel your pain in your post. I especially though like what you said about a few friends who do have a heart for the Lord. It reminded me of this I'd just read from Charles Slagle. Apologies for the long'ish post, I've edited for length, but hopefully it will help. God's blessing, James.
---------------------------
REMEMBER
Isaiah 52:14, John 3:16
Worried Child,
I AM just, pure and holy. My love is limitless and seeks not its own. When those dark thoughts cloud your mind, causing you to question My love, I ask that you do one thing: remember the cross.
See it now. See the One crucified. See the humiliation, the horror of Innocence disrobed, mutilated and bleeding. Pain racks His every atom. Each gasp of air is agony untold. His every nerve is a conduit of fire.
Can you hear Him cry? No one else can either, but I can. I hear it forever—how could I forget it? It's almost the sound of a boy—a stifled, intermittent cry it is . . .
No, child, don't turn away. Not yet, please. Do you see the thorns piercing His brow? The disfigurement of His face? The spikes splitting His hands and His feet? The jeering crowds at the foot of His cross? They didn't kill him. They would have if they could have—but they could not. He gave His life. He shielded His enemies who were worthy of death by dying Himself in their stead. He suffered murder to save His murderers. He suffered shame to save His mockers. And He would do it again. Again and again. And so would I. Is this not the destiny of Perfect Love in a fallen world?
This is the way love is, and this is the way I AM. Never forget it.
Entreatingly, Father
Also from C. Slagle--
May I share a word of advice? Ask the Lord to grant you grace to:
*refrain from debating about this full gospel or being overly anxious to help other to "see" it. Give the Holy Spirit room to work!
*forgive people who in the past conveyed the gospel inadequately to you—or perhaps even spiritually abused you. Instead, thank the Lord that they gave what they had, and ask Him to shower His healing and blessing upon them.
*not make understanding Christ's total victory a requirement for fellowshipping with your Christian brothers and sisters—whatever you do!
*not make this full gospel "your subject" conversationally more than enjoying the Lord Himself and bringing His healing life to others. People who think a good deal, who have been deeply wounded, can fall into that snare while the devil throws a party! JESUS CHRIST MUST REMAIN THE FOCUS.
*be led of the Holy Spirit in all situations where the Lord Himself receives honor and—by His power—lives are transformed and healed. Even if it means on occasions He may lead you to minister truths that seem to reveal little or nothing of Christ's total victory.
*become a brighter light that attracts others to Christ Himself—and not just words and concepts about Him.
*not be hurt if some Christians misjudge you. Trust the Lord to do business. He will! Hasn't He always? Remember, some who misunderstand you today may be beside you proclaiming Christ to a needy world tomorrow!
*be at liberty not to go to great lengths to hype or to hide your understanding of the gospel. Just enjoy constant fellowship with the Lord and trust His light to shine through you.
*remember that, by God's astonishing grace, many Christians who do not completely share your understanding of Scripture—nevertheless—know God's heart, perhaps better than you do! So avail yourself of every opportunity to be blessed by your other praying, Christ-honoring brothers and sisters. You need them and they need you!
JESUS IS LORD! - Charles Slagle
Hi Gabe,
I love your intro, your avatar and your signature!
Looking forward to talking with you..
sparrow
Hello gabe and welcome. :Sparkletooth:
- Byron
PS - You are not alone...
Hi Gabe, :hihat:
:welcome: to the Tent!
Paul