Commandments?

[Dallas]

The only thing I EVER did wrong -- EVER -- was I didn't have the strength to obey God about a 40 day fast that He spoke to me about during the October before that marriage fell apart.  But my behaviour was flawless.

Maybe it was you ego and selfrighteousness....cause as far as I know flowers and perfect behaviour don't build relationships...

As far as your flawless behaviour, sorry but I don't believe you.

[martincisneros]

As far as your flawless behaviour, sorry but I don't believe you.

Doesn't change what Holy Spirit told me about it, just because you've known neither me nor my Father.

[Paul Hazelwood]

The only thing I EVER did wrong -- EVER -- was I didn't have the strength to obey God about a 40 day fast that He spoke to me about during the October before that marriage fell apart.  But my behaviour was flawless.

Maybe it was you ego and selfrighteousness....cause as far as I know flowers and perfect behaviour don't build relationships...

As far as your flawless behaviour, sorry but I don't believe you.

I have met many a Christian who are convinced that however they act is righteous because of their religious behavior and claims of their (cough cough) devotion to the Lord.

Of the people I've known in person that has always been the problem.  The idea of flawlessness while we are in human form on this earth is a lie and a deception.  

[martincisneros]

I have met many a Christian who are convinced that however they act is righteous because of their religious behavior and claims of their (cough cough) devotion to the Lord.

Of the people I've known in person that has always been the problem.  The idea of flawlessness while we are in human form on this earth is a lie and a deception.

No, I've had plenty of screw ups before then and since then, but Lord Jesus was firm with me last year in the matter that I conducted myself zero differently from Him in that matter 'cept for the two parts of she wasn't the one, so I deviated from His will in that, and I didn't get that 40 day fast accomplished that He'd told me to do.  He's been clear that that wouldn't have saved that marriage that He Himself was trashing and burning for all of eternity (not me or her, but that marriage) but it would have made my transition into His perfect will seamless rather than a rollercoaster ever since, but with regards to my treatment of Wendy, it was 100% accurate.

[Paul Hazelwood]

Can't delve into the unprovable any further than this,  a marriage can fail for 1000 reasons, none of them that fail has only one side to blame completely, not one. 

One just often decides there is nothing they see worth working out.

For the most part courtships never reveal the total person that gets revealed once all the sugar and masks come off after the hitchin ceremony, some people just decide that they aren't going to put up with whats under the mask for the rest of their life. 

Divorce is the big bad dirty word in religion, but sometimes it is the best thing that can ever happen for two peoples happiness.

[martincisneros]

Precisely, especially in cases where God had an agenda in Personally ending it because He's joining a different couple out of the ground zero of all of the mess.  Too many hypotheticals to explore on why He's the cause of divorce in some cases, while with the rest it's predominantly the weakness of the flesh to blame.  In my case, God was destroying that because I knew going into it that it wasn't His will, and He backed it up, trust me.  I've never been after anything other than His perfect will ever since.

[Syndicated]

Martin;

I've been through divorce as well, and I personally thank God for that, that I can look back upon that as marriage rather than personal whoredom.  It simply was not to be because I made a series of bad decisions that weren't based upon either the Word or Holy Spirit.

I knew going into it that it wasn't His will, and He backed it up

I have to say that God ALLOWED you to be married.... it WAS His WILL that you be married, to grow and learn to trust in Him, to learn a life lesson... who really knows the reason?  He has His reasons and that's what matters.  If it wasn't in God's will to happen then there's no way that He would even allow the begining of that repationship to take place.  IMO if you deem it to be a 'personal whoredom' then that's an issue you may have to look at within yourself - what would make you feel like that?  What's the reason you would judge yourself as such?  If you see it as a learning experience from God then there's no way you would be able to see it like that as it was God that brought you into that relationship for His purpose.  If you take God out of it completely then it's understandable that you would see it as whoredom.

God brings people into our lives for reasons, yet it's up to us to choose how to treat those relationships.

marriage or not, relationships are left in the hands of people, and people crap all over everything

The idea of flawlessness while we are in human form on this earth is a lie and a deception.

I have to say that I agree with these two quotes 100%.  I am also divorced, and there's no way that it was 100% one person's 'fault' that the marriage is over.  Agreeing with Dallas's experience, I can honestly say that there's no way a government issued piece of paper made a heck of a difference in his mind to decide to not be faithful to our marriage.  I can say that I was the 'perfect' wife... I worked full time, came home to cook, clean, do laundry, pick up after him, was still fulfilling my 'wifely duty' when he wanted, and stayed home every night while he was out playing hockey 5-6 nights a week... does that mean that I was a flawless person within the marriage?  Heck no.  I do not have perfect behavior and there's no way I will ever claim to.  A relationship takes 2 people to work through, whether it be God's will that it fails or not.

Can't delve into the unprovable any further than this,  a marriage can fail for 1000 reasons, none of them that fail has only one side to blame completely, not one.  

One just often decides there is nothing they see worth working out.

For the most part courtships never reveal the total person that gets revealed once all the sugar and masks come off after the hitchin ceremony, some people just decide that they aren't going to put up with whats under the mask for the rest of their life.  

Divorce is the big bad dirty word in religion, but sometimes it is the best thing that can ever happen for two peoples happiness.

Very well said Paul.  I know I am much better off now that I have been divorced for a few years than if I would have decided to stick out the marriage because I thought that was what God would have wanted... before I realized that God allows things to happen to us, whether they're bad or good.  I can say that God taught me some pretty valuable lessons through my divorce.

I've had plenty of screw ups before then and since then

I thought you said you had flawless behavior?

But my behaviour was flawless

Yep, you did.

[Paul Hazelwood]

Very well said Paul.  I know I am much better off now that I have been divorced for a few years than if I would have decided to stick out the marriage because I thought that was what God would have wanted... before I realized that God allows things to happen to us, whether they're bad or good.  I can say that God taught me some pretty valuable lessons through my divorce.

My sister got a divorce after being beaten within an inch of her life (literally) and she was well justified in doing so.  My Sister was not free from blame as she could hit the most hidden button in just about anyone.   However, that said, she was still justified in divorcing the man and the man considering my sisters behavior would have done a great service to both of them if he had just walked away from the marriage if he was so infuriated by what my sister would do.  It would have spared my sister from harm and him from jail.


They were both immersed in the religious nonsense that they had to stick it out through the thick and thin of each others contemptible hearts, I suppose that means to some on the outside that my sister should have just went back to the man.  Religion talks a good talk, but in practice it has really bad breath.