My name is Kyle Milner and I am 16 years old. My conversion to Christianity wasn’t really a big event. I never had a Saul-Paul conversion with Christ coming brighter than the noonday sun…. at least not on the outside. What happened on the inside was just as significant. I was brought up in a good home, with two loving parents, who made sure I knew the difference between right and wrong. Or, at least what they thought was right or wrong. I was a pretty good kid, too. I kept out of trouble and it only took one time of getting in a fight, or getting caught stealing for me to realize not to do it again. Nobody ever told me much about God and the only times I went to church was a few weddings, and when we visited my grandparents in Kansas. From what little exposure I had, I figured the God thing to do would be to get baptized. After all, I thought, even if I made bad grades in school or made a lot of people mad, I still wasn’t “bad” because I was baptized. So at age 11, I got baptized at an Episcopal church, but my commitment ended right there when I walked out of the church doors. I never gave any more thought to God or spritual things until I was 14.
My freshman year in high school I thought I had met the most beautiful girl in the world. She was funny, smart, and I had her in most of my classes. She was different though, because she was a Baptist preacher’s daughter and spent a lot of her time at church. As we became better friends, she invited me to a local Youth for Christ meeting. Unfortunately, I don’t have a story yet about how we fell in love over the Gospel. Since that meeting, we have attended the same church but each went our separate ways. Anyways, it was at the meeting that I evaluated my relationship with God and decided that there was some work that needed to be done. I came to the saving knowledge of Christ through that meeting, or to better phrase it, the Southern Baptist’s saving knowledge of Christ. I’m not sure of the exact date, but one night in the early months of ’96 I “accepted Christ” and became a born-again believer.
I was faithful to my denomination until summer ’97. That’s when I started having the questions and doubts. I remember for about a week or two, my prayer life consisted of begging Jesus not to let anybody go to hell. Also, ever since I joined the church, I had been taught that it is our responsibility to ensure that the whole world hears the Gospel, and if it is by my fault or fear or sin that causes someone else to miss salvation, then on Judgment Day their blood will be on my hands. This scared me because I just knew that it would be me that failed to witness faithfully and I would be the only saint in Heaven with bloody hands for all eternity. As utterly disgusting as that thought is, there was one even harder for me to imagine. If it is my fault that someone has to spend an eternity in hell, shouldn’t my punishment be a little more severe than bloody hands? They’re baking in an endless oven while all I have to do is stuff my hands in the pockets of my shimmering white robe to hide my shame. All of this just didn’t seem to be a description of a Jesus whose mercy, judgment, and justice are all perfect and loving.
I was introduced to Universalism kinda by accident. While I was browsing religious subjects on the web I stumbled on the Saviour of the World Series by J. Preston Eby. The introduction to it asked “Can it be True—Will Jesus Torture Billions Forever?” This sparked my interest. I was still holding on to my pride at first because my first thought was to read it and prove this guy wrong. As it turns out, I didn’t even get past the study of the Greek word “Aion [eón]” before I figured out that I was the one in the wrong, and Eby had something I wanted. I finished the Saviour of the World Series and love it. Since then, I have been reading anything I can about Universalism. I am so happy and thankful that Christ has revealed Himself to me in this way. The Spirit of Truth has set me free from “religion” and “Churchianity” and shown me what His true plans are for mankind, and I look forward to the day when the Sons of God shall be revealed. So now, I have finally learned that I never really “accepted Christ.” I just realized that Christ had accepted me, and not only me, but all of mankind.