Confessions

[Lefein]

It has been only a few months now, literally that I have aligned my beliefs on the foundation that God will be All in All.  Only a few months and I have learned so much, and received clearer, and more beautiful revelations, thoughts, ideas, and inspirations in many aspects of my life.

God has given me a special gift, the gift of knowledge, and insight into how he is working all things for good.  All things indeed, will be beautiful in time.  He gave me the gift of Ultimate Reconciliation, the gift of Himself, to see that the omnipotent, omniscient, omnipotent supreme being, is also omniglorious, and especially omnibenevolent.  That he is the saviour of all men and women, young and old, newborn to toddler, toddler to 13 and 13 to the fullness of any human lifespan.

It is wonderful that I do not have to hate my enemies, because eventually I will love them, even if I am angry with them right now.

It is wonderful that my prayers for the lost will be answered, I do not have to worry now about my future children going to Hell, or my friends who are lost - they will be with me when sin itself is forgotten, and only bliss is living memory.

It is wonderful that everything in the universe is on an upward trend, and the only thing looking down - is God himself.  There is no bottomless pit for wretched sinners to be flung into forever by a vindictive God who arbitrarily picks, and chooses, and judges on a whim expecting us to overlook unrighteousness in his favouritism.  There is no torture chamber of reality - only world-lasting chastisement for the purification of the wicked, and the righteous.  All will be salted with fire, the just and the unjust alike.  Even if the fire is literal, it is for our good that it is made.  The same fire that warms the righteous on the cold night, dancing warmly in a holiday hearth will burn the dross from evil silver to make it pristine and sanctified.

It is wonderful that God is so beautiful now, and so powerful that nothing will hinder him, nothing will steal his creation away from him not even the free-will of man, for he shall align all wills to freely dance with his own in love, truth, and genuine glory.  Harmonious like a perfectly played symphony of many unique, and lovingly made instruments, sounding for his glory.

It is wonderful that I can call him Father.

It is wonderful that I do not have to be afraid of Heaven, and forever more Hell is a bygone faerie tale, a Halloween ghost story, a pagan myth superseded and replaced by the true light of his omnibenevolent grace, and perfect justice.

Thank you Father for the gifts you have given me, and the privilege you have entrusted me with, choosing me as a first fruits and trusting me with the knowledge of your power, I who am so lowly without you.  I am only dust, but you breathed into me yourself, and so I am alive.

I am a living epistle for the glory of God, and his power.

I am 20 years old, and have only a high school diploma.  I live in rural Ohio, and I have come out of emotional war, after emotional war.

When I was a younger teenager in middle school (12-13) my family was broken apart by rebellious teenage sisters, and so there has been emotional warfare and a negative cloud over my house ever since.  God is working to lift this, I am certain!

In recent years, I loved a young girl who was a very poisonous and hurtful girl, and she tore my heart in pieces despite three years of praying for her every day, and doing the best I knew how to be the best for her that I could be.  She excluded me from everything in her life, on purpose, and in front of me while excluding me, would include everyone, and everything else.  She would talk to others, but give me nothing but frozen silence.  I was to her, nothing, and I knew it.

It got so bad, that I would thank God from the bottom of my heart after we would have an argument - because at least I got to talk to her, and I had her attention for a moment.

I was a fool, who wanted to marry this.  But God knew his purposes and despite my rebelliousness, and my insistence on staying - he pulled me out, and again, and again, and again pulled me out of self-afflicting abuse.  And little by little, began to let my heart grow cold, and hard, until it shattered and remained like shards of broken glass, hurting and alone.

I know that he will heal her also, she only knew rejection, and so she dealt it out to me for some reason that I am not sure I'll ever understand...I forgive her, and forgive her every day, God loves her more than I ever did.

But he had purposes behind the warfare, and he has healed me piece, by piece.  I have made tremendous progress because he has aligned my will to his, and is aligning it even now - leading me from pasture to pasture.  And soon I will be free of the pain entirely!  I know that on my part, God is taking my perpetually petrified, turned to stone heart, and giving me a soft one made by his very own hands.

He has also used my experiences to help a friend of mine, who has gone through worse.  Brothers in arms are we, and making progress together to the better and brighter things we are going to receive.

I do not know what his beliefs were concerning Universal Reconciliation before, or if he believed in Hell, I think he did.  But when I shared with him some verses, he I am certain accepted it whole heartedly saying; (paraphrase)

"It seems like there is nothing to worry about now."

Forgiving people is easier and in fact it is the only option: They'll be in Heaven eventually, I might as well get used to being forgiving now on Earth.

I no longer have the option of subtly damning someone to Hell, or imagining them there after they insult me.  Sometimes, much to my chagrin  :laughing7:  God is making me mature!  And have a mature mindset about people.

I am so thankful for what God has done for me, and I am looking forward to the future.

In only three short years, God took me out of the shallower waters of Christianity, and pseudo Christian thought, mixing Christianity with other religious ideas like Wicca, and Newage - Hence I know to some degree the enemy.  And he has brought me into the deep waters, and put me through what I call a "crash course growing".  I am excited to wonder at what he shall have revealed to me when I am 30, or 40, or 50.

I want to lift up every praise to God that can be lifted.  I am not much of a worshiper, I don't exactly dance or shout or run the floors...I'm a bit of a philosopher (stern thinking) I guess, though mostly a poet (excitable and happy with art).  But if I did run the halls, dance, and sing - they'd be for God.

And so this is my testimony.

God is mighty, and saves.  I am living proof that he is.

[Lefein]

<Edited some of the above post>

[jabcat]

Father YHWH, heal and bless my brother.  In Jesus' name.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sR8rlTIU8_Y

[Molly]

God has given me a special gift...

Yes, he has.  He has given you many special gifts, not the least of which is your talent for writing.

May you continue to grow in His grace and wisdom, and continue to enjoy the fruits and power of the living God.

You give me hope!

[rosered]

  WOW ! what a great testimony Lefein !! your faith has made you whole ! Luk 17:19   And he said unto him, Arise, go thy way: thy faith hath made thee whole. 

  :HeartThrob: and to the Glory of God even
Been blessed just to read this .....when you know you have the Lord God  seated on the throne of your heart , you got it all !

[Cardinal]

 :cloud9: Beautiful testimony, Lefein.....God has indeed blessed you in many ways, not the least of which is revealing so much to you at such a young age.  :girlheart: