Maybe some background on myself will help you to see why I ask the questions I do. I'm still afraid of hell, as a place of eternal torment and damnation. This may seem strange, but I am also afraid that God, at least as we know him, isn't real. Now, it may seem silly to you that I'm worried about both these things. I don't know why, I just am.
Um, more background. I'm eighteen years old, male, I was raised a Christian, like I said in my earlier post, but I have always been worried, and had doubts. I don't know why. Many times I have prayed to God to help me out. To give me faith; and to show me what he wants me to do. I have some, mental problems. I have panic attacks, moderate depression, and really bad obsessive compulsive disorder. Before you discount me, I want to say, it got so bad once, I almost considered suicide; just to get the thoughts I was obsessing over to stop. Also, bad news tends to affect me, and seem more believable than good news to me. I guess that's one reason why I tend to be affected most by people who say the Bible isn't true. I used to spend all my time reading apologetics sites, mostly fueled by my fear (Not the right kind.) of God and hell. Trying to convince myself it was true, because I was, and still am to some degree, afraid of hell. (As defined up there ^.)
I guess I'm looking for some reassurance, and I ask for prayer. (My real name is Bryant, no last name, not right now.) So many people, supposed "Bible Scholars", archeologist, scientist, and just plain doubters that say that the Bible isn't true. Or that this contradicts that; and things of that nature. I don't want to believe them, but there seems to be so many of them. Sometimes I'm worried I'll at some point lose my faith, and then God will be very angry at me and burn me forever. Okay, I gotta stop now before I start crying. What do you think I should do?
(On a side note, maybe I should go back to my Doctor and try and get some medication. I don't take anything right now, and I don't want to start.)