OBITUARY
Common Sense Died
We mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old common sense was, since the birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
Common sense will be remembered as having cultivated valuable lessons, such as knowing when to "come out" of the rain, why the early bird catches the worm, that life isn't always fair, and that just maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults not children are in charge).
Common Sense's health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. And the reports of a six-year old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing his classmate, teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch, and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student , only worsened his condition.
Common sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer panadol (acetaminophen, i.e. Tylenol), sun tanning lotion or sticky plasters (first aid) to a student, but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant, and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband, churches became businesses, and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating (replaced by opinion) when you couldn't defend yourself from an intruder in your own home and the burglar got the right to sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman working in her office failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot, not hell. She spilled some in her lap and was promptly awarded a huge settlement based on greed.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; His Wife, Love; His daughter, Responsibility; His Sons, Diligence and Reason. He is survived by the Harlot and her daughters; I know my rights (Ignorance), someone else is to blame (Deception), and I am a victim (Lies).
Common Sense drifted in and out of consciousness, until his death. Not many attended the funeral, as few realized he was put in the grave due to heart failure.
Memorial Contributions may be given to mere opinion, as sound thinking has died.
"The death of Common Sense was and is caused by man's rejection of God and the truths, which are mixed with the views of humanities opinions and imagination; their continued rule will make sure that sound thinking stays dead."
Farewell, Common Sense, may you rest in peace from the majority.
